Femme, Butch or what the hell are you?
If there is something that I find irresistible is a woman's sexuality. I myself feel attracted to very sexy, feminine women. I don't understand why some lesbian women are attracted to hard core-butches? I really don't understand that. I know we all have our differences about everything. I think if I am going to be with a woman that dresses like a man, acts like a man, wants to be treated like a man. Then why not just be with a man?
I really don't understand that at all. I feel I am really attracted to women and that means everything about a woman. I don't want her acting like a man or dressing like a man. I want her to be as sexy as she can be. Dress up, use makeup, look and feel sexy. Her sexuality makes me desire her.
Isn't that the whole reason why you look for a woman in the first place? I love feeling a woman's soft body, her delicate way about her. Someone that knows she has it and knows exactly how to use it. And make me want her.
If you dress like a man, cut your hair short and start acting like a man... if I were to see you in a dark street I would totally think you are a man. Then what's the point? If I were attrated to a "butch" then I would be attracted to men. If that was the case than I would be with a man!
There are so many lables out there that make everything so confusing...why do we need lables? Why do you want to look like a man? If you are a woman then act like one too!
posted by Mar | 7:34 PM
13 Comments:
"Sexy" is all in how one perceives things. Dressing up in strappy heels and makeup and skimpy dresses doesn't make anyone more of a woman than anyone else. It doesn't make you a decent person. It won't make me desire you.
Maybe some women have a bit more testosterone than others, maybe they feel more comfortable in men's clothing, I don't have the answers either. But most of them are more gentle in a way that men never are.
I personally can't be bothered to get all dressy and doing all those annoying female things. (Though I will do it on occasion for love!) To me it's all shallow, unnecessary crap. If you can't be attracted to what's inside me, then you aren't the person for me.
I didn't mean that if you dress up I WILL LOVE you more!!!! That is not what I WAS TRYING TO SAY...OTHERWISE I WOULDN'T BE WITH YOU! You don't dress up fem way, but atleast you dont dress like a man either. Is not about what you are wearing that is true. But what ever is inside of me is reflected externally...!!!!
One person's perception of "acting like a woman" may not be the same as someone else's. I myself am very attracted sexy "femme" women and many "butch" women. I don't know what it is, I guess a lot of it has to do with the way that the person carries theirself and exudes their own unique personality. My girlfriend would definitely be labeled "butch" (except with long hair) but she does not want to be man at all. She takes pride in being a woman, she doesn't wear make up or curl her hair, dress up in a skirt, dress, or heels... but to her, those things don't make her a woman.
I've totally wondered the same thing, but I think it's just as simple as the fact that none of us can be dwidled down to a mere label. We are so much more.
I personally don't understand the attration to really butch women, but each their own. If I wanted to date a man I would.
But I also don't really like lables. I don't know how much of the butch/femme thing is people just being who they are and how much of it is people trying to create an identity for themselve to fit in where they think they identify.
Me, I'm just me. I'm not femme or butch. I'll wear a skirt or a dress if the occation calls for it, like this Friday night graduation ceremony. On a daily basis I dress sort of gender neutral. I have long no frills hair and I don't wear make up. I don't know, I'm just me and I'm not trying to fit into anyone elses mold.
Take a look at what you're saying there. If all lesbians were only attracted to feminine women, then you're basically saying that butch women don't deserve to be loved. The whole thing about gayness is accepting other people's differences. Your statement "you're a woman, act like one" sounds just like something a homophobe would say. Why should people conform to gender stereotypes ? If we all did that there wouldn't be any gay people at all.
For the record, I wears some men's clothes because they are more comfortable and fit me better. I have short hair because it's easier to manage and suits me better than long hair. I don't want to be a man or be treated like one but sometimes I am mistaken for one if people don't look too closely. I am 100% woman and I'm sure most butch women would say the same.
"what the hell are you" indeed !
I hope my post didnt offend anyone...if it did I am sorry. Those are just my opinions. If you are happy being femme, butch or whatever you want GREAT. Finding a happy place is the point. But my post ONLY reflects what I think...it was not intended to offend anyone.
Thanks
Hmmm....that's interesting. I guess that I never gave it much thought. It's hard enough to be comfortable "in your skin", as my Grandma would say.
I guess what I want to say is that there's a person out there for every taste. Male or female.
Look what you've started mar. Now we're in trouble because we aren't attracted to butch women. I don't recall saying no one should be, I said it wasn't my thing.
Wow, this post was a little can of worms. For the record, I'm not attracted to butch women either. But strangely, I'm sometimes attracted to "pretty" men.
Interesting observations there. ;)
Personally, I'm more attracted to the "slightly" butch woman than not. Not to say that sexy, very feminine women aren't gorgeous and I don't appreciate them.
I'm not talking the hard-core squoosh the breast, dress in suits, big, scary ones 'cause they just don't "do" it for me. Plus, I'm fucking intimidated by them...lol
There was a couple at my old, old job that one of them in the relationship was very, very feminine...very cute...dressed well, stunning to look at. And then there was the other, who wore her jeans and shirts and looked more comfortable. SHE was the hot one, in my opinion. I dunno what it was about her, but I was strangely attracted to her and we got along famously. I think it was her personality that attracted me.
Meh. I still prefer men. lol
My husband is fascinated by femme lesbians. He thinks they must all look just like they do in "the movies" (you know what type of movies). I tell him that that is unrealistic and I doubt that the majority of them are stunning models. Well, except of course, for you and Geeky. I hear you two are pretty hot.
Heh, she's the hot one. I'm lucky if I can pass for "cute". :)
I love butch women. They look like women to me and they smell like women to me... through every pore of their being. "Why if I am attracted to butch woman, shouldn't I just be attracted to a man" ummmm, because I am a lesbian. Thats why.
We are keyed differently.
http://comingoutat40.blogspot.com/search?q=ode+to+butch
be well,
nina
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